


Pick-up Pandemonium

by abitofarockyroad



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-24
Updated: 2014-05-24
Packaged: 2018-01-26 09:32:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1683524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abitofarockyroad/pseuds/abitofarockyroad
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas, in an attempt to woo the reader, takes Deans advice and uses some terrible pick-up lines.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pick-up Pandemonium

**Author's Note:**

> Written by Emma

You walked into the bunker, the plastic of the shopping bags you were carrying cutting into your fingers, slowly turning them purple. Running the last few feet to the table, you drop everything on top and shake your hands frantically trying to regain the feeling in them. Cas walks in behind you, his hands snaking round your waist and pulling you towards him. He nuzzles his face into your neck, whispering in your ear “I missed you”. You smile and turn to face him, placing a gentle kiss on his lips. 

“Cas. Honey. I’ve told you. Just kissing me every time I get home isn’t going to make me your girlfriend. You’ve gotta work for this.” You say, winking and collecting the shopping to put away into the kitchen. When you walk back out, you see Dean and Cas talking at the table. Laughing, Dean grabbed his laptop and starting typing, pausing occasionally so Cas could read over his shoulder. The look of confusion on Cas’s face was adorable, but when you began to walk over to see what they were doing, Dean slammed the laptop shut. 

“Go away.” He said, staring you down. 

“Excuse me?”

“Shoo. Be gone.” Dean said, grabbing his hip flask off the table. He unscrewed the lid and started flicking holy water at you. 

“Christo.”

“Dean what are you…” 

“Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio”

“Are you exorcising me?!” 

“infernalis adversarii, omnis legio,omnis congregatio et secta diabolica.”

”Ok! Ok! I’m leaving. Jeesh…” You mutter, walking into the kitchen to fix yourself some lunch. Deciding to eat in your room away from the weird which was happening at the table, you grab your plate and drink and walk out of the door, straight into Cas.

“Cas don’t do that!”

“What?”

“Just stand there silently. I almost spilt my drink everywhere. What do you want?”

“Urmm…” Cas said, nervously looking at his shoes. “Are you a painting? Because I want to…urmm…” he stopped to glance at something scrawled on his hand. “hang you up against the wall?”

“Nail! NAIL!” you hear Dean whisper from behind the bookcase.

“Oh, right. Nail you against the wall.” Cas says, smiling and looking incredibly pleased with himself. You sigh, roll your eyes and walk past him, heading to your bedroom. Glancing back you see Cas turn to Dean, and Dean shrugging. Laughing you close your bedroom door and relax on your bed. This could get amusing.

Half an hour later, you hear a timid knock on your door.

“Come in.” You shout, turning your eyes back to your laptop screen. You hear the door open, and glance up seeing Cas standing awkwardly in the doorway.

“Urmm…Do you have a..library card?” He asks.

“No? Why would I have a library card?”

“Coz I am checking you out?” Cas says to you, before turning to the side and whispering to Dean who was hiding again “This one makes no sense.”

“Just go with it.” You hear him mutter.

“Cas these are dreadful. Tell Dean to up his game.” You said with a laugh, returning to the video you were watching. Cas nods and leaves, shutting the door behind him. A couple of minutes later, there is another knock. With a sigh, you jump off your bed and walk slowly over to the door, opening it a crack and peering through to see Cas standing awkwardly.

“What do you want Cas?” You ask with a sigh, opening your door fully.

“Was your dad a baker?” He asked quietly.

“Urmm, no?” 

“Well you must be mistaken because you have a nice set of rolls.” He said, grinning and glancing to where Dean was hiding to gain approval.

“I think you meant buns.” You say, winking at Cas. Leaning round your door frame you see Dean leaning against the wall.

“Hey sweet cheeks.”

“Hi Dean. Is this the best you can come up with? Seriously? These are hilariously dreadful.” You say with a laugh. You try to walk past Cas but he blocks you.

“Wait, I have another one!” 

“Alright alright.” You sigh, stopping to listen to him. 

“Urmm…If I could urr rearrange the alphabet, urmm you’re the only ten I see.” He says, with a look of complete concentration on his face. “Wait that isn’t right…” but anything else Cas says is drowned out by Dean’s hysterical laughter. You see him, tears running down his face, clutching his stomach. The laughter is contagious and before long both you and Cas are doubled over too.

“You know what Cas, I think you’ve proved yourself worthy of my love.” You say jokingly once you’ve stopped laughing. His face splits into an ear to ear grin, and he moves forward to kiss you on the lips gently.

“So Cas, did it hurt?” 

“Did what hurt?” he asked with an adorable little confused head tilt. 

“When you fell from heaven?” 

“Actually it did. It took me a while to regain my full health. My wings are still painful at times.” He replies very seriously.

“No, Cas. It was a pick-up line.” You say, laughing.

“Oh, I understand now.” Cas says with a laugh. “Well it worked.” 

“I’m glad.” 

“Ok ok let me say one more. This one Dean told me to save till last.”

“Right…” you say cautiously, spotting Dean eavesdropping from behind a door.

“Are you a pirate? Because you got da booty!”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading guys. For more of our stuff check out our tumbr abitofarockyroad@tumblr.com :)


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